The other night dear, as I lay sleeping
I dreamed I held you in my arms
But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken
So I hung my head and I cried.
I dreamed I held you in my arms
But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken
So I hung my head and I cried.
- You Are My Sunshine
* Word of Caution: In my eyes, this is more about our AngelBaby, our family, and our faith getting us through it; and though I make every attempt to be vague in graphic details, and only share the bare minimum (in order to explain the ensuing health crisis), this is a story of miscarriage, and therefore you should only continue reading if you think you can handle it *
The next step was telling the family. My Mother was visiting her family in Germany, and sadly I had to tell her over the phone that her first grandbaby was no longer with us. She was understandably upset but was astounded by the idea that I was even attempting to miscarry naturally, versus have a D&C done. To be honest, I was surprised that I had decided to go that route as well. I never believed myself to be strong enough to handle seeing the actual evidence of loss - but I felt like because it was early on, and our baby only measured six and a half weeks, that it wouldn't be too hard on my body.
I was so very wrong.